Reflecting on 2023 and Welcoming 2024

It's that time of year again – the season of reflection and renewal. For those who've been following this blog for a while, you know this article is a holiday tradition for us. Each year, as the calendar turns, we share a set of thought-provoking questions designed to help you process the past year's experiences and look ahead to the opportunities and challenges that the new year brings.

Image by Annette Meyer from Pixabay

Dedicating just a few distraction-free minutes (as little as 10 will do the trick) to reflect can help you walk away with substantial insights. We've heard from both our coaching clients and dedicated readers that these end-of-year questions help build momentum and set a positive tone for the year to come.

Ready to get started? Just grab a pen and paper. (Yes, you can use your computer if you want, but you'll get the most out of this exercise if you write your answers out by hand because it engages your brain differently.) Remember, the goal isn't perfection; it's simply capturing your initial thoughts as they arise. There's immense value in slowing down and listening to your own insights.

What Did You Learn About Your Leadership in 2023?

What did you observe about yourself as a leader over the past year? What recurring themes or patterns did you notice?

One thing I realized this year was that I really benefited from putting myself in different settings with different people. These experiences exposed me to new ideas, shifted my thinking and added some new relationships to my network. I’ll maintain this focus as a way to continue to broaden my thinking in 2024.

What Did You Learn from Other Leaders?

Our growth as leaders often hinges on the wisdom and experiences of those around us. What lessons did you glean from your interactions with other leaders? Reflecting on those experiences can illuminate your path forward.

In 2023, I saw more leaders who embody the idea that vulnerability is strength. (Or maybe I’m spending my time with bolder leaders!) They remind us that everything doesn’t have to look perfect and that it’s OK to share your ups and downs because it gives others permission to be more authentic about their own experiences.

What Do You Want to Take Forward Into 2024?

Successful leaders recognize the importance of self-awareness. Do you pause often enough to acknowledge your accomplishments and how you achieved them? Identifying your 2023 wins and the strategies that fueled them will help you be more deliberate in using those strategies.

For me, 2023 was the first year without physical constraints since my surgeries in 2020. I got back to exercising regularly and was able to take some adventurous trips. Both things helped me keep my energy level high, and I plan to tap into the power of being in nature, exercising  and traveling in 2024.

What Do You Want to Leave Behind?

Have you experienced any setbacks, conflicts, limiting beliefs or lingering thoughts about changes you've been through this year? Resilience is not merely about powering through; it involves proactive introspection and learning. Reflecting on setbacks allows you to identify what may have impeded your progress and empowers you to make more informed choices in 2024.

When I thought about this question, I realized that in my eagerness to get New Lens® out to a broader audience and democratize access leadership development, I was spending too much time focusing on the gaps instead of my progress. We had some huge wins this year that I allowed to be clouded by my giant goals. Next year, I plan to focus on my passion and progress and celebrate our successes a bit more. 

As you prepare for 2024, equip yourself and your team with powerful tools designed to drive high performance and advance careers. If you haven't explored it yet, checkout our award-winning New Lens app which is designed to do just that. Schedule a demo now, and let's explore how New Lens can elevate you and your team in the coming year.

Finally, I so appreciate you being part of our community in 2023. This marks our final article for the year, but we're excited to return in the first week of 2024 with more resources to help you achieve your goals. All of us at Newberry Solutions wish you a joyous holiday season, a reflective close to 2023 and a prosperous start to 2024!

Newberry Solutions Turns 14

If you had asked me in early 2008 whether I would have my own business later that year, I would have called you crazy. Fourteen years later, I have to say that entrepreneurship has been challenging and rewarding. This month marks a major milestone because Newberry Solutions has been in business for the same amount of time that I worked at Deloitte!

A lot has changed during this timeframe, but our focus on passion and purpose remains constant. And I’m confident those two things will carry us forward as we build the next generation of high-impact, high-performing leaders — especially women. 

Coming from an Indian family full of high expectations and overachievers, it’s been a lifelong journey to take time to notice and celebrate accomplishments. If you struggle with celebrating your own successes, it might be a good exercise for you to make a list of them and notice what you’ve learned along the way. 

Here are a few bits of advice from my personal experience.

Tap Into the Power of Your Passion

When I founded this company, I knew I loved to develop high performers and that I needed a change. The intensity of the travel and work made it hard for me to show up in my life in the way that I wanted to, especially with my 2-year-old son. So, I decided to pursue my passion in a different way.

Starting Newberry Solutions was a mixed bag of excitement and unexpected twists and turns, such as the Great Recession and Hurricane Ike (I was Houston-based at the time). Reminding myself of the purpose and passion behind my business fueled me then and continues to do so today. In fact, it helped me work through two major challenges in 2020: the pandemic and a breast cancer diagnosis. 

Find Ways to Increase Your Impact

In my first few years in business, I underestimated the power of my strengths – which is ironic since I constantly coach leaders on how to tap into theirs. Once you notice what you do well and how you consistently do it, you can leverage your strengths to create a bigger ripple effect. 

We’ve figured out what helps us develop strong leaders, and more than 75% of our clients get promoted. Now if that isn’t motivation to have a broader reach, I don’t know what is! 

That type of impact has led us down a path I never expected – developing software. In this challenging business environment, we want to provide creative solutions. Coaching is a powerful solution but not easy to scale affordably. But through technology you can scale what makes coaching work. That’s the secret sauce behind New Lens®, our online platform designed to bring the benefits of coaching to more leaders and make leadership development more affordable and accessible to all levels.  

We’re on the path to success with several Fortune 500 clients, so please reach out if you want to see if New Lens can help your company.

Be Intentional

At Newberry Solutions, we focus on what gives us positive energy and have used that to guide our evolution. What brings you joy? If you’ve lost sight of it, it may be time to recharge and reflect. 

One thing that brings me joy is to make a difference by thinking and playing big. This is reflected in the Fortune 500 and global brands we serve and the platforms like the Wall Street Journal, Forbes and Fast Company that we use to share leadership strategies and tools. 

But our success at Newberry Solutions isn’t all about us. We are all about using our skills and experience to elevate others and give back. As a member of the board and the Orchid Giving Circle at Texas Women’s Foundation, I’m so proud of the POWER Leadership Forum we hosted to develop the next generation of AAPI women and support nonprofits (engaging over 800 women and raising almost $600,000 in grants since 2021). My passion also extends to United Way of Metropolitan Dallas, the Jane Nelson Institute for Women's Leadership at Texas Woman’s University, and the George W. Bush Presidential Center Women’s Initiative Fellowship Program.

Smell the Roses

While I’ve learned from the challenges over the past 14 years, the high points —including the invitation to join the Forbes Coaches Council and multiple awards (from the Stevie Awards for Women in Business and Dallas Business Journal, among others) — continue to motivate me to reach higher because they signal that something is working.

Today, it seems even harder to predict what lies ahead. But I do know this: If we continue to move toward our vision one step at a time, we will see big results. I believe that for my business. And I believe that for you, too. 

To Prevent Burnout, Do a Midyear Check-in

Can you believe we are already halfway through 2022? We’ve all been navigating a lot of change for a couple of years now, and that change shows no signs of slowing down.

That means it’s more important than ever to work mindfully and to take care of yourself. When you’re always charging full steam ahead, you’re risking burnout.

Photo by Anna Shvets

So let’s pause for a moment so you can check in with yourself and recalibrate. If you’re a regular reader, you know that I always recommend doing this at the end of each year. But in the intense work environment we’re currently experiencing, a lot may have changed for you in these past six months. And you may need to shift your game plan from the one you started the year with. The following questions can help you assess the best way forward.

Where Are You Right Now?

Sometimes it’s hard to look up from your daily responsibilities to see the big picture at work — or even how you are doing yourself. But you’ll be more productive if you can catch your breath for a moment and take a look around and within. 

First, how have the company’s priorities changed since the start of the year, and what does that mean for how you should spend your time? For example, if your company’s top leaders are prioritizing employee engagement, how does that affect the way you manage your own team?

Next, what changes have you personally experienced in the past few months — for example, going back to work in the office — and how have they affected your stress level? Remember that your executive presence is tightly linked to your internal wellbeing. In other words, feeling exhausted and overwhelmed will make it tough to exude a calm and confident demeanor that is so important for leaders to show right now.

What Do You Want to Take Forward?

Even if this has been a difficult year so far, notice what has worked well. What have you accomplished and what strategies made the biggest difference in achieving those results? It’s too easy to overlook your personal best practices if you’re moving quickly from one thing to the next. But when you pause, you can identify and leverage them to create positive momentum.

Here are a few examples to spark your own thinking:

• Regularly scheduling time to connect with people who give you energy.

• Getting involved in projects that develop your skills and leverage your strengths

• Engaging in activities that are fulfilling.

• Delegating at home and at work.

What Do You Want to Leave Behind?

Now let’s look at the other side of the coin: the challenges of 2022. What are the top two challenges you have faced and what have they taught you? For example, was there a type of situation you don’t want to find yourself in again, a behavior you want to change or emotional baggage you want to leave behind? 

A good way to distill meaning from challenging situations or roadblocks is to write a thank-you note (for your eyes only) to the difficult person or experience. By doing this, it will force you to reframe the negative aspects of the situation into positive lessons. 

What Do You Need to Do for Yourself?

You may have a to-do list that is a mile long, but how often do you make it onto your own list of priorities? Take a moment to identify what you need right now. If you honestly don’t know, getting more rest may be a good starting point. Other ideas could be:

• A longer break

• Regular exercise

• A flexible work schedule

• A new challenge or opportunity

Based on your answers to these questions, identify one small step you will take to set the tone for the second half of 2022. I also want to invite you to invest in your own growth and wellbeing with Newberry Solutions’ products and services, including the award-winning New Lens app.

How to Stop the Loop of Negative Self-Talk

I’m usually a positive person, but earlier this summer, I noticed that my inner voice (and sometimes my outer one!) was starting to drone on like Charlie Brown’s teacher. 

During my treatment for and recovery from cancer, I was vigilant about maintaining a positive mindset and keeping people with positive energy around me. But as the ongoing challenges of recovery and a global pandemic continued, I found it hard to consistently be positive. My attention shifted more to my fatigue and desire for things to be different.

Photo by Julia Avamotive from Pexels

What I experienced is sometimes called ruminative thinking. The thing about rumination is that the more you do it, the easier it is to keep doing it.

I knew I needed more than resilience tools to snap me out of the cycle. A vacation did the trick. It was my first “real” time off in a year and a half, where I could unplug instead of dealing with medical issues. And it allowed me to break the loop of negative thoughts and feel like myself again. 

After vacation, I had the mental energy to start using the resilience tools that I know work for me. And I discovered that many of my clients couldn’t seem to shut off their negative thoughts. It’s understandable, given that stressful events can lead to rumination. And we’ve certainly had no shortage of stress lately! But when negative thoughts start spiraling, you can break the cycle. Here are a few strategies to try.

Give Your Brain a Break

Shaking things up and taking a break from the grind of daily routines can reboot your brain – especially if you focus on what energizes you.

I did this by using my vacation to reconnect with close friends, get out in nature, and challenge myself — hiking, rafting, ziplining and other outdoorsy adventures. Being in the middle of nowhere and away from my technology helped me unplug. Researchers have found that a 90-minute walk in nature or exercise reduces ruminative thinking. Learning is another research-backed way to short-circuit rumination because it helps you focus your thoughts on the moment. For my son and I, learning to fly fish did the trick.

How can you shake things up and recharge? Even a one-day staycation can be mentally invigorating. Do something to get you out of your daily patterns and reconnect you with your authentic self.

Honor Your Feelings

Until you can make time for a break, you can turn down the volume on your ruminative thoughts.

I work with high performers, who often use logic as a key driver in how they approach the world. Logic is valuable but you can’t rationalize your way out of a loop of negative thinking.

Your logical mind may tell you that it makes more sense to forget about whatever is bothering you and just move on. But your emotional mind won’t let go as easily. Rather than trying to talk yourself out of your feelings, see what happens when you acknowledge what’s happening. By giving yourself permission to feel the way that you do — even if you don’t want to feel those emotions – you will move through your emotions more quickly.

Enlist Some Help

Get an outside perspective to help you stop ruminating. Ask someone whom you trust and who will be honest with you to help you snap out of negative thinking. Give them some guidance about how to help you in advance. For example, tell them that if they notice you complaining about the same things over and over, to remind you of the tools and tactics that help you feel more resilient. Below are some resources you can have on hand for when you need them.

• How to Discover Your Resilience

• Escape These 7 Thinking Traps

• How to Move Forward Amid Uncertainty

• 10 Ways to Use Your Body to Change Your Mind

• How to Overcome Negative Feelings

Remember that the goal isn’t to stop negative self-talk from ever happening. It’s to help you break the cycle more quickly. If you’ve found yourself ruminating lately, what’s the first step you will take this week to make a shift?

10 Ways to Use Your Body to Change Your Mind

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

As high performers, we're used to thinking of solutions for challenges. But sometimes all that thinking just doesn't work. Trying to think your way out of feeling stressed, frustrated or stuck often ends up making things worse. In the same way, it's hard to think yourself into feeling energetic, confident or calm.

Instead, there's another approach that can be a lot more effective — and a lot more fun. I'm a big believer in using your body to change your mind. More and more research shows us the power of the mind-body connection. Because of this connection, some activities that might not feel productive can actually help you be at your best.

So the next time you find yourself thinking about how to solve or fix something (especially if that "something" is your own mood or mindset), turn your brain off for a while and try one of these ideas instead. 

1. Get Moving

Exercise doesn't just enhance your physical fitness. It also gets your brain in shape. Studies have found a pretty amazing list of mental benefits from exercise. To name just a few, a good workout helps your brain produce feel-good endorphins, improves your stress response, boosts your confidence and reduces anxiety. The next time you feel stressed or stumped, step away from your desk for a walk. Even a quick break for some physical activity can lift your mood and clear mental blocks.

2. Go Outside

That walk will benefit your productivity even more if you can take it outside. Time in nature is a scientifically proven mood booster. It lowers your blood pressure and levels of cortisol, the "fight or flight" hormone. And when it comes to boosting your energy, a nature break is right up there with a cup of coffee. When you return to your desk, it should be easier to focus and concentrate.

3. Laugh It Up

If you tend to check social media during your breaks, skip your news feeds and go straight to the page of your friend who shares the funniest memes. Or perhaps watch a few minutes of a standup special or comedy series. I don't have to tell you that a good laugh feels great. But it also has profound effects on your body and mind. Laughing raises your energy and lowers stress and negative feelings. It can even help you process something that's been bothering you.

4. Let the Tears Flow

Crying may not feel as good in the moment as laughter does. But it's just as beneficial for you. When you cry, your body releases chemicals that can actually help ease both physical and emotional pain and leave you feeling calmer. Some researchers even think crying purges stress hormones and other toxins from your body. If you tend to hold back tears and "push through," see what happens when you give yourself the time and privacy to release all that tension in a good cry.

5. Give and Get Hugs (Safely)

One of the hardest things about the Covid pandemic is that it has limited our physical contact with people we care about. But now, as more of us get vaccinated, there should be more hugs in our future. And not a moment too soon. Touch lowers stress hormones and raises our body's feel-good chemicals, like serotonin. If you live with others, don't forget to spread the hugs to them, too. Sometimes we get lost in our phones in an effort to de-stress. But it would actually lower your stress a lot more to put down the phone and call for a group hug.

6. Maintain Your Appearance

As the pandemic continues on, many of us are feeling lethargy and apathy. In the words of one woman interviewed by The New York Times, remote work has us stuck in "deep pajamaville." Getting out of pajamaville can help us cope with pandemic fatigue. We often talk about maintaining a professional appearance in terms of how it makes others perceive us. But don't forget that the way you look, and the level of care you put into your appearance, also affects how you perceive yourself. This week, devote a little extra time to getting ready even when you don't have a Zoom call. Pull a favorite outfit or accessory back out. Pay attention to how changing your physical appearance affects your confidence and energy.

7. Boogie Down

One advantage of remote work? You have the privacy to get your groove on to your favorite music when you need a break. Dancing can help you stave off anxiety and depression, research has shown. Need some new moves? Get your kids to teach you viral dance trends from TikTok.

8. Belt One Out

While you're dancing, feel free to sing along (even if your kids cringe). Like spending time in nature or getting a big hug, singing lowers the stress hormone cortisol. So go ahead and unleash your inner Beyonce or Bruno Mars.

9. Strike a Pose

No time to take a walk — or stage your own mini musical production number? Just take a moment to stand up and put your hands on your hips (think Wonder Woman). Researcher Amy Cuddy has found that "power poses" like this one help us become "happier, more optimistic, more confident, more creative, more likely to take action, more likely to seek rewards and opportunities, (and) more physically energetic."

10. Be Still

A lot of the ideas in this article involve moving your body in some way. But sometimes what we need most is to quiet the body and, in turn, the mind. Meditation allows us to pause our relentless doing to just be. Practicing mindfulness meditation changes your brain activity — even when you are not meditating.

Your body holds as much wisdom as your mind does. What is it telling you it needs right now? Commit to trying at least one of these ideas this week. For more self-care strategies like the ones in this article, pick up a copy of "Staying in the Driver's Seat," part of my Leadership EDGE℠ series.

Strategies to Stay Calm & Focused in Uncertainty

Did you ever think you’d get this much experience navigating the unknown in this short a timeframe? Well, I certainly didn’t. In addition to all the changes that the coronavirus pandemic brought to my business and personal life in 2020, I was diagnosed with breast cancer on January 2. Although I’m cancer free now, there are still days where I ask myself, “Did all that really happen in 2020?” It was slow and fast all at the same time.

The good news is that I learned some incredible lessons – ones that will serve me for a lifetime and that I will share with others. For starters, the four surgeries and four rounds of chemotherapy in the middle of a pandemic reaffirmed for me that we have far more control over how things unfold than we realize.  I hope that some of these strategies resonate with you, especially as you navigate what’s happening in your life.

Focus on What You Know

When there's a lot of uncertainty in your life, where do your thoughts go? For most of us, it’s all too easy to zero in on everything that you don't know, or the gap between where you are today and where you want to be. Instead, ground yourself in what you do know. What information do you have about your situation? And what else do you know that can be helpful now? For starters, you have shown resilience in the past and know what's helped you during other tough times. And you know who can provide the kind of support you most need, and how they can best do so.

Be Fully Present

We can all play the “What if…?” game. It can be exhausting. Worrying about all the different scenarios and how they might play out in the future can drain the energy right out of you. Take a minute to notice how often you hit your mental "fast forward" button and project into the future when you are stressed out. 

After chemotherapy, I remember how I would go through unpredictable waves of feeling good and feeling bad. For example, I would feel fine for a half hour and then terrible the next half hour. At first, I would get disheartened when I realized that the “feeling good” was only temporary. But, over time, I recognized that I needed a different strategy. I didn't want to ruin the time that I actually felt good anticipating and worrying about when or if I would start feeling bad again. By focusing on the present moment and how I could make the most of it, it changed everything. What would change for you if you shifted your attention from the future to the present—to what’s happening right in front of you?

Take One Step at a Time

A big change can leave you with an overwhelming list of items to work through. That's true whether we're talking about a serious illness, a job loss or even a crisis like the winter storm we recently went through in Texas. If your focus is on solving that giant issue or project looming over your head, it can be paralyzing. If you find yourself in this situation, ask yourself, “What is one step that I can take now to start moving in the right direction?” When you’ve completed that step, identify the next. Framing things this way makes even the toughest challenges a lot more manageable. By not focusing on solving the whole problem, you will be able to solve it faster. There is a reason why my mantra is “small steps can lead to big results.”

Before you move on to the next thing in your day, I want to challenge you to try one of these strategies now. And if you'd like to hear more ideas on building a change mindset, check out Patti Johnson's interview with me on the "Be a Wave Maker: Conversations on Change" podcast. I’ve even gone back and listened to it myself to make sure I don’t lose sight of some of those small, but powerful steps that can make a big difference.

How to Move Forward Amid Uncertainty

It all adds up: Election stress, pandemic stress, economic stress. Not to mention the regular stresses of our busy lives.

But no matter where we are emotionally right now, and no matter what lies ahead, we're all working to keep moving forward on the things that are important to us.

Your instinct might be to just keep pushing yourself. But that's not sustainable. Instead, I want to encourage you to take time today to think about where you are and to plot your path forward.

It's easy sometimes to overlook the first part of that process: checking in with yourself. But self-awareness, especially during times of change, is a crucial part of being a leader.

How Are You Right Now?

That's why I want you to pause to consider how you are doing at this moment. Where would you place yourself on a scale of 1 to 10?

A “10” means you consistently feel strong, optimistic or resilient. You developed strategies that have been working well for you this year. A “1” means you may feel depleted, drained or are struggling from week to week. You're at your lowest point of 2020. If neither of those extremes applies to you and how you feel vacillates, you may fall somewhere in the middle.

Remember that this exercise is less about the numerical rating and more about being honest with yourself and noticing what’s going on for you.

Next, think about what has helped you navigate all the uncertainty of 2020 so far. What has kept you going and gotten you through the most difficult times? Here are a few possible answers to help spark your thinking:

• I've felt my best this year when I've protected my time for exercising even when my schedule is hectic.

• I've discovered that writing down my feelings really helps me de-stress.

• Talking with friends, colleagues or mentors who lift my energy has helped me deal with the hardest parts of 2020.

What Do You Really Need?

Finally, pick one of those helpful habits or activities and think about how you can bring it to the forefront. This is important no matter what your emotional state and stress levels are right now. If you're feeling good, understanding why this is so will help you keep building on your momentum. If you're not doing so great, the best way to start turning things around is going back to the tools and strategies that have worked for you before.

Either way, make sure the step you focus on is easy to implement. It should involve an action you can take immediately to give yourself more of what you need. You can even share what you are doing with someone close to you so that they can hold you accountable.

As always, I want to remind you that small steps lead to big results. That's never felt more true. And I'm here to support you as you take those steps. Here are a few more resources that can help:

• Why pausing makes you more productive

• How to use passion to overcome fear

• When you are tired of being strong

• The best leaders ask for help

• All self-paced tools from Newberry Executive Solutions

Have You Seen these Resources?

Throughout my career, I have had the chance to learn from and work with some great thought leaders. So, this week, I thought I'd share three resources with you from people whose work has helped me and my clients.

Put Your Mindset to Work

I had the opportunity to meet Paul Stoltz last month, and am impressed by his ability to take complex research on resilience and overcoming adversity and turn it into something you can apply in practical, simple ways. His latest book is Put Your Mindset to Work. The Adversity Quotient lays the foundation for his subsequent books, and has some good gems in it.

A Smarter Way to Network

I had a chance to meet and work with Rob Cross when I was at Deloitte, and I'm a huge fan. He has done some valuable research on networking, identifying what distinguishes high performers from others. He's an author, professor, and business consultant. You can buy his latest HBR article, published in July 2011 and listen to an interview with him by clicking on this link: https://hbr.org/2011/07/managing-yourself-a-smarter-way-to-network.

BRAG! The Art of Tooting Your Own Horn without Blowing It

For those of you who have trouble letting others know about how you create value and make a difference and haven't been able to attend one of my workshops on the topic, take a look at this book by Peggy Klaus.