Develop Your Team While Managing Your Energy

One of my clients recently struggled with a leadership dilemma: Her high performers energized her, while the team members who need more development — and thus more of her time — often left her drained. If her situation rings true for you, here are three ideas to help you guide your team’s growth while managing other priorities as well.  

Notice Your Energy On any team, some people will take more of your time and energy. How does spending time with them affect you? And how does it affect the way you engage with the rest of your team? Based on what you notice from your answers to these questions, proactively plan energizing activities or interactions right after draining situations. Remember that the quality of the activity matters more than the quantity of time you spend doing it, so it can be quick.

Express Gratitude Acknowledge and appreciate what each team member is doing right. We often take for granted that people know what’s working and focus our feedback on what should change, but your team needs to hear what they’re doing well so that they know to keep doing it. Be specific. Just saying “You’re doing a good job” doesn’t provide much useful information. And be prompt. Take a minute to pull your team member aside after a meeting or conference call to review what she did well. I also have clients who carve out a few minutes each week to send emails acknowledging good work. Quick tactics like these will give you energy while maximizing your team members’ strengths.

Cultivate the Right Mindset When working with the team members who require more of your energy, go in with a mindset of acceptance: They are who they are. What’s the best way to engage with them? And do you need to set any boundaries? Of course, you’re focused on helping the team member succeed, but also think about what you need in order to participate in a positive way. For example, I have a client who often lets feedback conversations drag on too long. And that has turned into reluctance to initiate this kind of conversation, even when it is important. By simply setting some time limits for these conversations, he changed his whole energy around these interactions.

This week, identify which of these strategies you will put into play. And remember that small steps can lead to big results.

Working with Millennials…and Everyone Else

Millennials are all around us. These young, enthusiastic Generation-Y professionals are gaining a foothold in the workplace and the world. Born in the early 1980s, these workers have been viewed across a broad spectrum from adaptable and skilled multitaskers to lazy, entitled and unmanageable job hoppers. Media outlets touting “30 under 30” and “The Young Entrepreneurs” are feeding the stereotype. A recent study by Cornerstone OnDemand focused on three generations' views of workplace technology. The State of Workplace Productivity study shared some interesting insights…as well as misconceptions about the working preferences of younger versus older workers.

The Cornerstone study revealed that millennials prefer in-person team work and are pro-gadget, but also may be hitting their tech limit. "Gen-Y workers, whom we have largely pigeonholed as having an insatiable appetite for technology, are expressing both a desire for more human, face-to-face interaction and frustration with information and technology overload," said Jason Corsello of Cornerstone OnDemand, which released its survey in November 2013.

So how do you work with – and for – them? In my book Show Up. Step Up. Step Out., one of the chapters offer four practical strategies on creating a high performing team (among a host of other strategies to boost your effectiveness). Check it out to see if these easy-to-implement tips can help you reach your goals.

Set the Tone for 2014 with the Right Conversations

As last year ended, I encouraged you to reflect on what you learned in 2013 and what you want to take forward and leave behind. To support your goals and set the tone for the new year, consider three potential conversations that could move the ball in the right direction:

Your boss Kick off the year with a clear idea about what’s expected of you and your priorities for the next twelve months. To avoid misdirected time and energy, clarify and confirm with your boss what success really looks like. If your boss can’t articulate it for you, define success as you see it and ask for feedback.

Your team Make the highest and best use of your time and talent while building stronger capability within your team. Talk to individual team members about potential projects that can help them expand their skills and/or expertise. Look for opportunities within existing projects, whether that involves delegating some of your own work or redefining project roles. It may free up some of your time, and give you capacity to focus on where you can add the most value.

Your support staff Leverage your support staff to keep you focused. Have a conversation to make sure they are clear about your highest priorities (e.g., specific projects, relationships, and results) so they can help you focus and manage your time more effectively.  Enlist your staff to protect time for what matters most, including appointments with yourself to reflect and follow up, and to ensure that you are accessible.

Whether it’s these topics or others, this week I challenge you to initiate at least one conversation to lay the groundwork for a successful 2014. And remember, small steps can lead to big results.

How Do You Influence Others?

As leaders, we depend on the ability to influence those around us to garner support, drive organizational changes, and execute on our day-to-day responsibilities. If you’ve been feeling less than influential lately, start by evaluating your approach. The Center for Creative Leadership identifies three tactics for influencing: Head, Heart and Hand.

• Head – a logical appeal focused on organization and individual benefits and typically full of data and facts

• Heart – an emotional appeal linked to something the person cares about such as individual goals and values

• Hand – a cooperative appeal that offers collaboration, consultation, and alliances

First, identify which approach typically influences you.  Then consider which one you typically rely on to influence others.  They are often one in the same. Remember that persuasive leaders can skillfully use all three methods and select the approach most effective for the audience at hand.

By consistently matching your influence style to the individual, you will see people shift from resistance or compliance to true commitment – which can generate results with less effort.

This week, strategically consider what approach will resonate with the next person you want to influence, based on what you know about him or her. This small step can affect whether or not your message is heard or any action is taken on your behalf.

Making Awkward Feedback Easier

Whether you’re a new manager or veteran executive, there’s a certain kind of employee conversation that never seems to get any easier.

I’m sure you’ve been faced with it: An employee has a behavior, habit, or mannerism that’s giving people the wrong impression of her or diminishing her effectiveness. It’s not a performance issue, but it affects how the employee is perceived. And she probably doesn’t even realize she’s engaging in it.

I’ve worked with clients who dread these conversations and put them off. They’re worried that their feedback will be misunderstood, that they might damage the relationship or create needless drama. To help them take action, I remind them that as difficult as this kind of feedback can be to deliver, they are offering it out of genuine concern for the employee and a desire to help her succeed.

Here are three simple steps that can make these conversations easier.

1. Start with your intent

Remember that you’re having this conversation because you care about the employee and want to help her remove an obstacle that’s holding her back. You can always acknowledge that this is an awkward situation for both of you, but that it’s important to talk about the behavior. If you were in her shoes, you would want to hear the feedback. Expressing compassion and your own vulnerability can create a stronger connection in the moment and may help defuse the tension.

2. Communicate the impact

Help the employee understand her behavior by identifying it, providing information on when and where you’ve noticed it occurring, and sharing its impact. For example, maybe her sour expression surfaces primarily in long meetings with a key stakeholder group. Talk about the effect, from what you see or what you’ve heard from others. “I know this isn’t what you intend, but I’ve heard others say that your facial expressions sometimes leave them with the impression that you are resistant to their ideas.”

3. Be part of the solution

Offer ideas about what she should do more or less of. Sometimes it can be very powerful to ask the employee to focus on how she wants to show up in the interaction. In other words, by helping her identify what she does want others to notice or take away from their interaction with her (e.g., openness to ideas), she may stop engaging in the other limiting behavior.

After that, it’s a matter of finding tactics that work for her. That could mean using a visual reminder like a note with the word “open” on it, so she can see it during her meeting and pay more attention to her body language. If an employee is receptive to it, offer to help her monitor the behavior. That could involve giving a cue when the employee starts to engage in the distracting behavior during a meeting or setting aside time for feedback after the meeting.

This week, consider whether there’s an awkward conversation you’ve been putting off and decide how you will approach it with the mindset of helping your employee succeed. While it may be a difficult moment for both of you in the short term, ultimately you will find that it strengthens your relationship and builds trust in the long run. Remember, small steps lead to big results.

Put Your Coaching Skills to Work

As you know, I returned from ICF Conference in London two weeks ago. Now that I have had a chance to think about the experience a bit more, I realized how much change coaching can affect. Yes, I know it sounds weird coming from an executive coach. But as I sat in a ballroom of almost 1000 coaches from 58 countries, hearing example after example of how coaches have rallied together to help local communities recover after massive natural disasters, helped companies drive unprecedented business results, and collaborated to build coaching skills; I was truly proud to be part of the profession. It inspired me to do more and think about how I can continue to work with my clients and our local ICF chapters to think even bigger. So today, I want to challenge you to think about how you will put your coaching skills to work.

When was the last time you asked someone how you could help them achieve their career goals?

Throughout the years, I have regularly asked each of my teams what they want to get out of a particular project or experience, whether it was something work-related or a volunteer opportunity. Doing this allowed me to think more strategically about their development and how I could put my network to work for them. Many of you may have conversations about career goals as part of the performance management process (goal setting, mid-year, and year end), but I encourage you to revisit them throughout the year.

How often do you delegate with development in mind?

As you gain experience, certain aspects of your job may feel routine. So you may underestimate how much you can teach others about what you do and how you do it. The next time you delegate something, do it with the other person’s development in mind. How can you stretch them? How can you leverage their strengths? Asking these questions may shift how you position the work and how you work with the person to complete it.

How much do you advise versus coach?

Although there are times when people truly need your advice (perhaps because they don’t know what they don’t know), there’s so much power in asking thought-provoking questions to generate new insight. This can change a person’s perspective and the choices they ultimately make about the path forward. So before you think about jumping straight to giving advice, stop and ask yourself whether an open-ended question could be more impactful.

So, I urge you to put your coaching skills to work this week. Identify one step you’ll take to make a difference. And remember that small steps can lead to big results.

© 2012 Neena Newberry | All rights reserved.

Looking from the Outside In

I remember the first time I worked with an executive coach when I was a Director at Deloitte. It was truly eye-opening. People who know me well know that I'm a self-help book junkie and my own worst critic. However, when you're in the thick of the day-to- day pressures and demands there are some things that you just can't "see" on your own. It usually has nothing to do with your intelligence, but has more to do with whether you can find ways to "look at the situation from the outside in." Let me give you an example of a recent client, Suzy, a leader frustrated about an employee's subpar performance. She was convinced he had potential and was trying to figure out how to help him improve. I asked Suzy to explain in detail how she was working with this particular person. As we got deeper into the conversation, she shared that she was giving him recommendations, checking in with him daily, and personally investing a lot of her time. Nonetheless, she saw no notable change in his performance.

I asked whether she thought he had the intellectual horsepower and capacity to do the job, and Suzy immediately said, "Yes." Hearing this, I realized that Suzy may have some blind spots about the situation. So, I asked her a series of questions to help her "look at the situation from the outside in." These questions might come in handy the next time you find yourself in a perplexing situation:

1. What is your underlying intent in this situation?

"I want to keep this employee in the company. His technical skills and knowledge are valuable and hard to replace, and he has potential. I want to help him in any way that I can."

2. What is at stake?

"I'm relatively new in my role. If this fails, I will be viewed as a failure. It will take forever to find a good replacement. I have to make this work."

3. What messages are you sending through your words and actions, regardless of your intent?

Words - "I am willing to invest my time to help you improve. I am concerned about your performance but think you have potential. I want to keep you in this company."

Actions - "Daily meetings with him and sometimes his team, offering numerous recommendations, dedicating hours of my time to him each week despite other priorities."

Messages Conveyed by these Actions - "I don't trust you, so I need to look over your shoulder every day. I don't think you can do the job, so I'm going to do it for you. My way is the best way, so this is how you should do it."

4. If roles were reversed, how would you feel in this situation?

"Incompetent, embarrassed, like I'm about to be fired and should be looking for another job."

By answering these questions, Suzy realized the pressure she felt and how she was sabotaging her own efforts to improve her employee's performance. So, we took her insight and came up with a different approach - one that engaged her employee in the solution without micromanaging him. I'm pleased to say that she is finally seeing that potential turn into performance.

So, keep these four questions handy and find someone to help you objectively look at your situation "from the outside in."